Wholesome Doesn't Have to Mean Vanilla: Rediscovering Play at Relationship Recess
Last year, I invited one of my partners to join me at an event called Relationship Recess.
His response?
"Platonic AND sober? No thanks."
I laughed, but honestly, I think his reaction speaks to some of the assumptions people have about gatherings in the non-monogamous community.
Because yes, Relationship Recess is exactly that. Platonic. Sober. And, as it turns out, wonderfully wholesome.
And I absolutely loved it.
Less Relationship Work, More Play
In May 2026, I attended the inaugural Relationship Recess in Clermont, Florida, hosted by the teams behind Normalizing Non-Monogamy, Multiamory, and Breakthrough Play.
What initially drew me to the event was how closely it aligned with my work at Amory Wellness, but with a slightly different approach.
Instead of doing the work, we'd be doing the play.
Much of my work centers around pleasure, intimacy, sexuality, and human connection. And while that can be a whole lot of fun (it's a tough job, but somebody's gotta do it!), I also spend a good deal of time helping people navigate the more challenging aspects of relationships: attachment, jealousy, vulnerability, communication, and all the messy stuff that comes with loving other humans.
Even the healthiest relationships take effort. That's something I remind my clients (and myself) all the time.
But sometimes I wonder if we get so caught up in working on our relationships that we forget to simply enjoy them.
A Different Kind of Non-Monogamy Community
One of my favorite parts of the weekend was meeting people from so many different places along the relationship and sexuality spectrum.
Living in a relatively conservative part of the country, I've found that even our local non-monogamous community can be fairly homogenous. So it was refreshing to be surrounded by people with such a wide range of relationship structures, identities, experiences, and perspectives.
There were people who had been practicing non-monogamy for years, people still figuring things out, and people who simply wanted to connect with an open-minded community.
And what I loved most was how normal it all felt.
We could have wonderfully candid conversations about sex, kink, polyamory, swinging, and all the other ways humans choose to connect, and then go play games, share meals, or make new friends.
It was sexually open-minded without being a sexual event.
Wholesome doesn't have to mean vanilla.
Yes, Really. Platonic and Sober.
I want to emphasize this part, especially for anyone who's curious about exploring ethical non-monogamy but might feel a little intimidated by attending their first community event.
Relationship Recess is NOT a sex party, a lifestyle takeover, or a meat market.
There is no expectation of sexual activity, flirting, or finding new partners. It's not clothing-optional, and it's intentionally alcohol- and drug-free.
The focus is on friendship, community, games, laughter, and good old-fashioned play.
You can come alone, with a partner, with friends, or with your whole polycule. You don't even have to be non-monogamous.
And I think that's what makes this event so special.
For someone just beginning to explore ENM, it offers an opportunity to meet people, ask questions, and experience the community without the pressure of a sexually charged environment.
For those of us who've been around the block a few times, it's a reminder that our communities are about so much more than who we're sleeping with.
Sometimes it's just nice to be around people who get it.
We Talked About It on a Podcast!
I recently joined fellow attendees Tommy, Rah, and Enma on the Normalizing Non-Monogamy podcast to share our experiences at Relationship Recess.
One of the things I kept coming back to was how wholesome the experience felt, despite being surrounded by people who were perfectly comfortable talking about all sorts of sexy, kinky things.
I loved that we could have those conversations openly without the event itself being about sex.
If you'd like to hear more about our experiences, give the episode a listen!
Come Play With Us in 2027!
Relationship Recess is returning April 9–11, 2027, in Clermont, Florida, and I'd love to see more familiar faces there.
It's three days and two nights dedicated to play, friendship, and connecting with people who understand that relationships don't all have to look the same.
Whether you're brand new to ENM, have been practicing for decades, or simply want to spend a weekend with a bunch of open-minded humans, you're welcome.
You can find all the details about tickets, lodging, and activities on the Relationship Recess 2027 website.
And if you're thinking about going, please let me know!
Because yes, I'm a big believer in doing the work. But I'm also a big believer in knowing when to put the work down and just play.
With love and warmth,
Cat Ferris
Amory Wellness
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