Lesson I: Sensate Focus
Foundations of Presence & Embodied Awareness
Letting go of resistance—and of the ego’s need to control or perform—is one of the most challenging things we can do. It is also the first doorway into deeper connection, self-awareness, and embodied trust.
This session is grounded in Sensate Focus, the foundational touch-based practice developed by sex researchers Masters and Johnson, and is further informed by basic Reiki principles of touch, presence, and energy flow.
From Sensate Focus, we take the emphasis on slowing down, releasing outcome-based attention, and reestablishing trust in the body through direct sensation. From Reiki, we draw an approach to touch that is receptive rather than forceful—guided by listening, attunement, and respect for the body’s natural rhythms.
Together, these approaches create a container where touch is not something that does something to you, but something that allows your system to reveal what is already present.
What Sensate Focus Is (and Is Not)
Sensate Focus is not about arousal, climax, or “doing touch correctly.”
While some people may notice arousal arise naturally, it is neither the goal nor the measure of success.
Instead, Sensate Focus invites you to:
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Slow down
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Feel without striving
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Observe sensation without judgment
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Listen to your body’s responses rather than overriding them
This is a practice of awareness, not achievement.
What to Expect in This Session
As our journey begins, I invite you to take a deep breath and arrive fully in the present moment. Together, we intentionally release expectations—about what should happen, what your body should feel, or how you should respond.
In this session, our roles are clearly defined:
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As the receiver, your role is to notice.
You observe sensations, emotions, impulses, and edges as they arise—without needing to act on them or change them. -
As the giver, my role is to remain deeply attuned to your body, nervous system, and energetic responses.
Touch is offered slowly, intentionally, and with ongoing consent, allowing your body to lead the experience.
Through this mindful exchange, touch becomes a language—not a performance. It communicates information, reveals patterns, and gently restores trust in your body’s innate wisdom.
You are always invited to speak, pause, or adjust. Your autonomy is central.
Why This Matters
Many people live disconnected from their bodies—only noticing sensation when it spikes into intensity, discomfort, or urgency. Sensate Focus rebuilds the capacity to feel subtly, safely, and without pressure.
This practice:
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Reorients you toward presence rather than performance
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Helps regulate the nervous system
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Creates safety around sensation and touch
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Lays the groundwork for deeper emotional, relational, and erotic awareness later in the curriculum
In Neo-Tantra, presence is the foundation.
Before energy can move, before intimacy can deepen, before desire can be integrated—the body must feel safe enough to be felt.
Sensate Focus is where that begins.
A Gentle Note
This session is appropriate whether you are:
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New to body-based work
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Rebuilding trust with touch
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Healing from disconnection or overwhelm
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Seeking a grounded entry point into Neo-Tantra
There is nothing to achieve here.
Only something to notice.
Preparing for Your Session
To support presence and bodily awareness, I recommend avoiding heavy meals in the hour before your session. You don’t need to arrive hungry—just comfortable enough that your body isn’t focused on digestion. Light snacks and hydration are always welcome.
